Dramaturg as Hobgoblin

HOW TO BE A DRAMATURG this is a question I hear many of you asking but don’t worry I am here to HELP with some HELPFUL TOP FIVE TIPS:

1. First things first you must find yourself a CHOREOGRAPHER so lie in wait where one might pass by (for example near the PATH in the WOODS or under a BRIDGE). Seduce them with promises of SECRET KNOWLEDGE and ANCIENT MAGIC(K)S, entice them with your REFINED TASTE, PHD or INDUSTRY CONNECTIONS, or even the mere COMFORT AND SECURITY OF YOUR GAZE. They may seek the protections offered by invoking/crediting your DREAD NAME.

2 As a DRAMATURG it is best to speak of vague concepts like ATTENTION or TEMPORALITY or LOVE or THE ETERNAL NIGHT. If you end up making a MISTAKE or causing a BIG PROBLEM don’t worry because PROBLEMS ARE PRODUCTIVE NOW and you merely have revealed an INNER SPIRITUAL QUEST (or perhaps COLLABORATIVE DIFFERENCES) that the CHOREOGRAPHER must RESOLVE.

3. It is important that the CHOREOGRAPHER continues to depend on you, if they grow TOO CONFIDENT gently UNDERMINE them with probing questions and obscure references; if they become TOO DISTANT send a COMPLIMENTARY AND INSIGHTFUL MISSIVE about another project they’re working on. This will ensure their return and subsequent offers of FRESH SACRIFICE or VALUABLE TREASURE (depending on the outcome of fundraising efforts).

4. Remember that as a DRAMATURG you are the FRIEND of the CHOREOGRAPHER, you are not the ENEMY, you are not there to TRICK or BETRAY them or DEVOUR THEIR SWEET FLESH AS THEY SLEEP, it can be hard to keep this in mind throughout the CREATIVE PROCESS but please try your best.

5. And last but not least don’t forget that if all goes TERRIBLY WRONG you can simply MELT INTO THE SHADOWS: to retreat to your lair to wait for another CHOREOGRAPHER to stumble within your reach. Their VICTORIES may bring GLORY to your name, but their MISTAKES are their OWN.

I hope these top tips on HOW TO BE A DRAMATURG are helpful so please comment, like and review below. Get on out there you amazing DRAMATURGS and work your MAGIC(K)S! I BELIEVE IN YOU!!! xx

4 thoughts on “Dramaturg as Hobgoblin”

  1. I like all these Paul Hughes!
    Accept 5. I think one should keep a hold of responsibility in relationship, even in it’s magical form

  2. Thanks Hayley. I think responsibility is tricky: sometimes I think my responsibility as a dramaturg is to be irresponsible.

  3. I’m just wondering whether this is a series of dramaturge as…, do you accept requests and, if so, would you write dramaturge as Argentinian Freudian psicotherapist?

  4. um obvs yes to all three. let me get on this, expect something written in five years or so… gotta go deep cover….

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